So I Take the Week Off...

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​...and Captain Funnypants adorns the front of the world's greatest tailgating website with a pot leaf. Hmmmm. I guess when the cat's away the mice will play. But there's been no Iowa preview, no predictions...no one really stepped up in my absence. That's unfortunate, but I'll be back in full force next week.

So here's the Iowa mini-preview:

  • Iowa lost last week to Indiana

  • Drew Tate watched video of Michigan vs. Penn State and pooped his pants

  • Michigan leads the series 39-10-4

And here's the mini-predictions:

The Hammer:

  • Well the game everyone has been anticipating has arrived, although maybe not on the week expected. Ladies and gentlemen it is game three of the road to Ohio State. To recap, MSU wasn't a trap game nor was Penn State, so let me introduce you to the Iowa Hawkeyes. Battered, beleaguered and recently upset by one of the worst teams in the country. And what do we have to play for? We don't owe them anything and they're not very good. So let me ask again, what do we have to play for? Some may caution that this is the same University that almost pulled off an upset in the big house in '97 and that the same could hold true this year. But my theme for the season has been validation. Prove yourself each week. And Lloyd thankfully is on my side...

  • There should be something in there that's a motivating factor, because we don't live in a vacuum. We know where we are. If we're a smart football team, which we have been this year, then we understand that you better be focused on who's coming to town this week and what we need to do to get better. I think that's clear for all of us." Loud and clear. Crystal.

  • Michigan 31
    Iowa 10

The Xbox

  • Michigan 14, Iowa 10

The Webmaster:

  • Michigan 24, Iowa 0

Johnny Cleveland:

  • This has all the makings of the scare/trap game.  Iowa was supposed to be
    vying for a share of the Big Ten title and they go and lose to IU last
    week.  That coupled with *6 still being out are the worst things that
    could happen as our focus could be lost.  But this squad has been resilient
    all along and won't stop now.  Look for Iowa to lead early and maybe even
    at the half.  But the D will create turnovers eventually and we will be
    able to leave early to watch Game 1 of the series.  Michigan 30 Iowa 21

    OMVP : Hart
    DMVP : Hall

Coming Together

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Road Success

The Michgian Wolverines may not be the most exciting team in the country, but they no doubt play in the most exciting games in the country. Following up a time-expired victory against Penn State at the Big House, Michigan went on the road to Iowa to face a Hawkeye team that hadn't lost at Kinnick in three years. After a Hawkeye field goal tied it as time ran out in regulation, Michigan looked to build on their perfect overtime record. The defense held Iowa to a field goal, and Senior tailback Jerome Jackson, filling in for Max Martin, filling in for Kevin Grady, filling in for Mike Hart, punched it in from the one yard line to give Michigan the victory, 23-20.

They lost the turnover battle, and were outgained both in passing and in rushing for the second straight week. And though they were riddled with injuries on both sides of the ball, Michigan found a way to win in Iowa City, breaking the Hawkeyes 22-game home winning streak.

Tailgate Success

A long drive with an overnight pause in Davenport proved successful for our traveling tailgaters. We spent a spirited Friday evening cavorting about Rock Island, Illinois, at a bar filled downtown area known as The District, hitting nearly every tavern in the area for at least a drink. Dragging a bit on Saturday morning due to sleep deprivation, we managed to still put together a full spread of breakfast food and bloody mary's that made Hawkeye passers-by drool with envy. Another great week with another great victory...and now we look ahead to a battle in Evanston with Big Ten Championship implications. EVERY GAME COUNTS!

Quick Theme Change

In lieu of enduring a long day of cold and greasy fast food, we have opted to change the theme to soups and stews for next week's game at Northwestern. The Commissioner's Sausage and Cheese Chowder will be on the menu. See you there!

 

The Corner of Bourbon and Stadium

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And Now, The Big Ten

So Act II of the 2004 season begins, and in "just fine" fashion. A still-stagnant offense was made to look better by a turnover-forcing defense, and with spectacular play by Braylon Edwards, the Wolverines were able to post 30-points, with 16 coming in the second quarter. Chad Henne completed 16 of 26 passes for 236 yards and a touchdown...and more importantly, no interceptions.

The defense struggled to stop the circus-like passing attack of the Hawkeyes, but managed to come through when it counted with a big stop or a big turnover. Iowa's rushing attack was non-existent, netting negative yards.

But it was Stanford-transfer Grant Mason's 4th quarter 25-yard interception return for a touchdown that sealed the Wolverine's first victory against the Hawkeyes since 2001. This also marks the 23rd consecutive win for the Wolverines in Big Ten openers, as well as 36 of their last 37.

New Orleans Comes to Ann Arbor

The Tailgate was filled with Jambalaya, Gumbo (somewhat scorched), shrimp, and other spicy cajan treats. But there was room for the old standards, like cheesy potatoes and Captain Morgan, to keep our heads in (or out of) the game. Everyone came in costume, with beads, boas, hats, and even fake red facial hair, to make the day festive. Thanks to all who participated, the next theme will be posted on the message board soon.

On the Road Again

Michigan travels to Bloomington next Saturday to take on the Indiana Hoosiers. Michigan will be looking for their first road victory of the season against an inferior team. Sound familiar?

UMTailgate.com will take a 5-man crew down to the game...theme to be determined.

 

Drown Your Sorrows

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Special Ed

It will forever be known as the "Fun Punt Formation". I mean, who knows if we will ever see it again. The criticism it has received has been extraordinary. From Bob Griese in the booth during the game to every radio and tv commentary regarding the game since. So, I'm not sure if Lloyd will have the stones to run it again, but it would be FUN, wouldn't it?

Michigan jumped out to a 14-0 lead in this game, and all was fine in the Wolverine universe, but Iowa finished the game on a 30-13 run from that point, slowly but surely converting every Michigan miscue into some type of points. Once again however, it came to an end with the offense on the field, and an startingly familar overthrown 4th down ball by John Navarre. Iowa 30, Michigan 27.

Hell Week Continues

Minnesota remains. Consequently, the last time we won a road game was last year at Minnesota. Scary thought isn't it?

Still the Best: Team Can't Take Away the Spirit of UMTailgate

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What Makes Me Tailgate?

I love tailgating. I love Michigan Football. I love the feeling you get at the beginning of the season, hoping for perfection, having a clean slate, and knowing destiny is in control of the players on the field. I love seeing family members, both blood and tailgate inherited, in the unique setting that is the tailgate. I love seeing people grow up, grow older, and change as the weeks pass. I love the concerned look on the faces of others, wondering what my reaction will be after big losses. I love the way we inadvertently cheer each other up. I love the way names stiched into tailgating history make grown men cry. I love the way the wives and mothers marvel at the cooking abilities of the young men in the group. I love that 'away-win' feeling, when the home fans clear out and the Michigan players know and acknowledge the presence of their travelling fans. Iowa fans got that feeling this weekend. I love the superstitions, and the fact that we are undefeated when I wear a certain hat, a certain pair of socks, or see an opposing fan wearing a certain shirt. I love the class, the spirit, and the history surrounding Michigan Stadium and that we would never make a player or players bigger than the team by hanging a giant poster depicting them outside it. I love the way the Godfather has welcomed me into his tailgating family the same way he welcomed a small group of college students in Notre Dame eleven years ago, and the same way he welcomes all the newcomers each week.

I love tailgating. I love Michigan Football.

All Time Great Ass-Kickings

Michigan had it kicked, re-kicked, then force-fed to them by the Hawkeyes this weekend. Michigan suffered their worst home-loss since 1967. Iowa dominated every facet of the game, and most importantly dominated the scoreboard, defeating the Wolverines 34-9. Here's a list of some of the other greatest ass-kickings of all time:

Nolan Ryan over Robin Ventura: In 1993, Robin Ventura charged the mound to take out Nolan Ryan, only to be put in a headlock and repeatedly punched in the face.

Brian Herrgard over Tarek: In 1986, at Forest Elementary school, Tarek was dominated in a playground brawl in the first and only Riverview Wrestlemania.

Southgate Tough Guys over Dean Mourselas: In 1992, in front of the Southgate Harmony House, Dean was torn from his bicycle, and beaten by a group of unnamed assailants. His bottom tooth poked a hole in his bottom lip, requiring stitches.

Hulk Hogan over Andre the Giant: In front of a record indoor crowd in the Pontiac Silverdome, Hulk Hogan defeated Andre the Giant by way of a body slam, followed by the signature leg-drop and pin.

Up Next: Sparty

Preview coming on Wednesday, Tuggy's update on Thursday. Stay tuned.

GO BLUE!!!

The Webmaster