October 20, 2006

So I Take the Week Off...

October 20, 2006/ The Webmaster

...and Captain Funnypants adorns the front of the world's greatest tailgating website with a pot leaf. Hmmmm. I guess when the cat's away the mice will play. But there's been no Iowa preview, no predictions...no one really stepped up in my absence. That's unfortunate, but I'll be back in full force next week.

So here's the Iowa mini-preview:

Iowa lost last week to Indiana

Drew Tate watched video of Michigan vs. Penn State and pooped his pants

Michigan leads the series 39-10-4

And here's the mini-predictions:

The Hammer:

Well the game everyone has been anticipating has arrived, although maybe not on the week expected. Ladies and gentlemen it is game three of the road to Ohio State. To recap, MSU wasn't a trap game nor was Penn State, so let me introduce you to the Iowa Hawkeyes. Battered, beleaguered and recently upset by one of the worst teams in the country. And what do we have to play for? We don't owe them anything and they're not very good. So let me ask again, what do we have to play for? Some may caution that this is the same University that almost pulled off an upset in the big house in '97 and that the same could hold true this year. But my theme for the season has been validation. Prove yourself each week. And Lloyd thankfully is on my side...

There should be something in there that's a motivating factor, because we don't live in a vacuum. We know where we are. If we're a smart football team, which we have been this year, then we understand that you better be focused on who's coming to town this week and what we need to do to get better. I think that's clear for all of us." Loud and clear. Crystal.

Michigan 31
Iowa 10

The Xbox

Michigan 14, Iowa 10

The Webmaster:

Michigan 24, Iowa 0

Johnny Cleveland:

This has all the makings of the scare/trap game. Iowa was supposed to be
vying for a share of the Big Ten title and they go and lose to IU last
week. That coupled with *6 still being out are the worst things that
could happen as our focus could be lost. But this squad has been resilient
all along and won't stop now. Look for Iowa to lead early and maybe even
at the half. But the D will create turnovers eventually and we will be
able to leave early to watch Game 1 of the series. Michigan 30 Iowa 21
OMVP : Hart
DMVP : Hall

October 16, 2006

Case of the Mundys: Quick Hitter Edition 10/16/06

October 16, 2006/ The Webmaster

I'm skipping the weekend roundup to pack. So surf the internet your damn self.

Injury Report:

Bass / Kolodziej : Season

Tyler Ecker: Ankle, did not make trip to Happy Valley, status uncertain

Mario Manningham: Knee, successful surgery...I'm guessing he'll return for Indiana

That's all...I'm on vacation this week and leaving admin duties to Johnny Cleveland. You behave JC. I'll be checking in now and then.

FD-WM

October 16, 2006

We STILL OWN...Penn State

October 16, 2006/ The Webmaster

It wasn't easy for the Wolverines, and it wasn't supposed to be. Under the bright lights of Beaver Stadium, the white shirt-laden crowd of 110,000+, and without leading receiver Mario Manningham, Michigan found itself in a game that was in doubt in the 4th quarter for the first time this season. A daunting Penn State defense held the Maize and Blue under 5 yards a carry, and forced Pennsylvania product Chad Henne to throw for a season high 30 attempts.

Stalled for most of the first half, Michigan went into halftime with a 10-3 lead, with a 24-yard Henne-to-Arrington marking the game's only touchdown. A 24-yard slant to Breaston comprised mostly of YAC, followed by a 20-yard Mike Hart run set up Mike Hart's 6th touchdown of the season to make it 17-3 at the end of the third. And that's all you need to know about the offense. Because the offense isn't important.

Michigan's defense was the star of Saturday Night Football in Happy Valley, holding Tony Hunt to 33 yards on 13 carries, 78 yards below his season average, and 102 yards below his total against Ohio State earlier this year. Michigan held Penn State to a total of -16 yards rushing, and knocked out both first string quarterback Anthony Morelli and second string quarterback Daryll Clark, forcing probable red-shirt candidate Paul Cianciolo into the first action of his college career. It has reached a point where Michigan's defense is now feeding off the offense when it fails to produce. Whenever Michigan failed to convert, the defense seemed to get stronger, more aggressive, and for the opposing team...downright scary. And while a screen pass to Tony Hunt lead to a late fourth quarter touchdown and cut the lead to seven, Michigan's defense would not falter again. An incomplete pass on 4th and 6 allowed Chad to take a couple of knees and walk out of the only collegiate game he will play in Pennsylvania with a victory. Michigan wins 17-10, their 8th straight over Penn State, and 4th straight in Happy Valley.

Michigan Football, in seven short weeks, has gone from a vulnerable, wounded, and dejected program, to a team that has an advantage in every game they play from this point forward...before they even set foot on the field. That advantage? Fear. People are scared of Michigan again, and damn it feels good.

Under the cover of darkness, the glorious echoes of traveling Michigan fans came down from the alien-spaceship-like upper concourse of Beaver stadium. As if choreographed, "It's great to be a Michigan Wolverine," "Go Blue," and "Hail to the Victors Valiant" was heard in perfect harmony from the different packs of the Michigan faithful. The switch has been flipped. There is one goal. There is one path. And everyone knows where it leads. The heavy work continues for one more week, as a pissed-off Iowa heads to Ann Arbor coming off an embarrassing loss. After that, it's a full month of cake (unless you choose to fear Indiana) before heading to Columbus for what may be the biggest hype-fest in sports history...and that much hype still might not be enough to prepare you for what will most likely be billed as the game of the century.

It was the longest tailgate in UMTailgate.com history, spanning nearly 10-hours. It was filled with copious amounts of food and drink, with no less than five full meals courtesy of the combining of our tailgate with that of Gar's World. Breakfast sandwiches, sausage and cheese chowder, JJ's famous salmon, Garwiches, Mediterranean Chicken and Shrimp pitas, and a plethora of snacks and desserts. Yes, it was completely ridiculous...but so was the scene surrounding the stadium, as nearly 1000 individual RV's set up shop, each with their own unique tailgates. Tailgaters of all levels and from all walks of life came together, from simple small grills featuring hot dogs and hamburgers, to full large screen HD TV's with surround sound with filet mignons and multiple kegerators. It was an amazing day, an amazing atmosphere, and another solid Michigan victory.

The first edition of the BCS has been released, and Michigan is #3 in the poll, their highest ranking since its inception. The Wolverines are #2 in the AP (which is no longer used in the BCS), #2 in the Harris Poll, #3 in the coach's poll, and #2 in the computer poll average (where Ohio State is #3 and USC is #1). While all of this is really nice...you should only be thinking about removing Drew Tate's torso from his legs in 6 days.

October 13, 2006

They Want Revenge : Staff Predictions for Penn State

October 13, 2006/ The Webmaster

The Hammer:

I will state this once. Penn State is no better than Michigan State. In fact if we played both teams 10 times MSU would have a better chance of beating us. I hate that people are concerned about this game. That concern makes me in turn concerned. But if I allow myself to use logic and reason I come to this conclusion...

Michigan 24
Penn State 6

Play calling could be detrimental but I don't see how they score. If Trent isn't right or something flukey happens like a damn fake field goal or special teams touchdown or Chad has a brain lapse or, or, or, or...enough! We dominate. Now go to bed.

HART and HALL, book it.

Johnny Cleveland:

We head to H.V. with negatives all around as we are wounded and playing at night. JoPa seems to have a couple miracles left in him and we are just hoping we are not one of them. With that being said get ready for some old fashioned Michigan Football. We run, run and run some more unitl time of posession and field position is all the excitement we once again have.

As boring as it will be until #86 returns, it proves to be effective when you have the best defense in the country. Look for the emergence of the tight end, quite possibly young Carson Butler, to lead us to a low scoring win. Michigan 13, PSU 7

OMVP : Running Backs
DMVP : D-Line

The XBox:

Michigan blows a 14-0 first quarter lead, giving up 17 unanswered in the 2nd quarter.

Penn State 24
Michigan 17

The Webmaster:

Scared? Not really. Nervous? Nope. Wish we had Mario and that we were playing a half of a mile from where I'm typing? Yes. But this is part of the deal. Night games in fired up stadiums in the freezing cold wth a key injury...that's college football, or at least that's college football today. So let's just play Michigan football and I'll see you next week when we're 7-0. It's that simple.

Michigan 21
Penn State 10

Arrington and Woodley

October 12, 2006

Get Grandpa Joe Some Pepto: The Penn State Preview

October 12, 2006/ The Webmaster

Yes, it's been a light posting week. It seems that Captain Funnypants and his Navarre-esque posting consistency took the week off. It's tough to be mad at him...cocaine's a hell of a drug.

We pack up the family truckster and head to Beaver Stadium this week. Beaver Stadium is in Happy Valley, which completes the most blatant piece of sexual innuendo since construction workers selected I-75's Exit 69 to be Big Beaver Road. Well, maybe not themost blatant. It's been a tough week, coming off of the long Saturday tailgate and game, and trying to convince yourself that Mario Manningham is a product of offensive scheme and not a shitload of speed, a devastating first move, and perfect route running. Maybe you, like Sports Illustrated, think that Mario is the team, and without him the sky is falling. Then you woke up Thursday morning, and the sky was actually falling.

"The expectation is for the position, not the player," Lloyd will most certainly say. But I can't imagine you expected that position to net 527 yards and nine touchdowns. Nine touchdowns on 24 receptions. That's the type of stuff that will get you stalked by a 23 year old. Speaking of which, how do I get Lloyd's email address?

Anyway, back to Penn State...

The School: